Worst thing ever to happen

Yesterday something really bad happened.

I got home from the shops with Little J and popped her in her playpen whilst I put the groceries away. Suddenly I hear she is making horrible noises so I run out and pick her up. She is choking on something but I can't see anything in her throat.

H has told me what to do in this situation so I laid her down in my arms on her tummy and firmly hits her in the back a couple of times. Bring her back up and now I can see something black in her mouth. Poke my whole finger in and manages to push it out just before it goes down her throat again.

It was a little plastic spider; one from M's horror show bag. Far out. She calms down and I calm down, very shaky of course but otherwise I felt fine. Lots of cuddles and then I made some lunch for us both. A bit later I think that perhaps I need to tell H so I call him and as I tell him it kind of dawns on me exactly what an insanely dangerous situation that was and how close she was to choking and the fact that I saved her life. So I cried, several times.

Now M's toys are not allowed in the lounge anymore. He understands.